< Social Media and Divorce: Should I Unfriend my Ex on Facebook? | Puhl Law Group, PC

Social Media and Divorce: Should I Unfriend my Ex on Facebook?

Divorce Social Media Questions Answered

If you don't like someone's posts on social media like Facebook, you can usually unfriend them without them ever knowing. What happens when that someone is an ex-spouse? Should you cut ties and unfriend them? For most people, the answer is probably yes. It is one of the many things you need to do to move on with your life and make positive choices going forward. It is easy enough to block, unfriend, or un-follow a person on any of the social media sites. If you are in the early stages of your breakup and you think posts from mutual friends about your ex will be hard to handle, Facebook has a "hide posts from this person" option. You are still friends but their posts are hidden in your feed. If you still have a good relationship with your ex, you could have a conversation and let them know you plan on not following them on social media anymore. Let's face it, no matter what role you played in the breakup, you probably don't want to see what a "great" time your ex is having... or having with someone else. Oh, look, she checked into our favorite sushi place. Oh, great, he is getting a macchiato at our coffee shop. You can do without the constant reminders of what they are doing and with who. The flip side, especially if you know someone well (like an ex-husband/wife), is you can see how they are trying to make you feel from their Facebook posts. No one needs to feel that kind of social media desperation. What about with the kids? People sometimes feel it is good to stay connected to see what their kids are doing with an ex. There are other ways of communication that involve two people rather than a whole group. If someone wants to share a cute vacation picture with the kids, you could just text one another or email the picture. What about your exes extended family- parents, siblings and friends? This depends more on your individual relationships with these people. Are you still close with your ex's mom? Then, by all means, continue the relationship, both online and in person. Facebook, Instagram, and other social media sites are meant to help you feel connected to a larger community. Spying on your ex is not a good part of the equation. Now is a good time to rid your digital world from your ex. Also, does looking at other people's pictures or posts make you feel bad in general? Maybe now is a good time to take a social media hiatus and use that time to work on other aspects of your life.

Cleaning Up your Social Media

Facebook: Many people use Facebook as almost a life photo album. If you have kids together you can download the pictures of the kids and save them to a hard drive. Then you can go through and delete other pictures of your ex. If there is a group picture you can un-tag yourself by hovering over the mouse and clicking the tag button. Also, go through and remove pictures from your timeline. Then delete all the pics of your ex and unfriend him or her. Instagram: If you have an Instagram account you can go through and delete pictures of your ex or you and ex together. Unfollow them while you are at it. Shared Amazon Prime or Netflix Accounts: Un-share these. It's not worth the saved money, you don't want to know what your ex is watching, reading, or buying in general.

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