Finding a peaceful way to divorce

If you and your spouse have considerable marital assets, you may expect that your divorce will have some conflict. Likewise, if you and your spouse have children, there are sure to be issues over which you will not agree. However, these conflicts do not necessarily mean your divorce must be brutal, leaving you and your spouse with bitterness, resentment and uncertainty about your future.

Keeping your divorce peaceful is often a matter of making the choice to avoid unnecessary conflict. If you desire to end your marriage on a civil note, perhaps even leaving the door open for a reasonably friendly relationship in the future, you may have to decide to change your frame of mind.

Are you sure?

Moving forward with plans to divorce can having devastating results if you are not certain you really want to end your marriage. Sometimes couples get caught up in emotions, and before you know it, a couple who could have saved their marriage is dragging each other through court. Therefore, before taking the first steps, examine the situation to determine if you have exhausted every possibility of reconciliation or renewal. However, if you are ready to begin the process, here are some recommendations for avoiding hostility and unnecessary tension:

Respect: Even if your spouse's behavior during the marriage gives you the right to act otherwise, your respectful disposition from filing to finalization will allow you to come through with your dignity.

Consideration: Remember that your children are likely going through a great deal of confusion, and your civil behavior can save them unnecessary anxiety.

Goals: You may have issues with your spouse, but if you can agree to have one or two goals in common, such as seeking the best for the children or reaching an equal financial split, all of your other decisions can lead to those goals.

Alternatives: Your divorce does not have to be a courtroom battle. Many spouses find that mediation or collaboration provides a more civil method of divorce.

Of course, making these concessions does not mean you have to give up your rights. Texas law provides for a fair and equal share of community property, and you have the right to pursue your parental rights in any custody conflict. For these reasons, no matter what form your divorce takes, you will benefit from sound and experienced advice and guidance.

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